Relationships are integral to humanity. No one exists without it. We are all tied, in one way or the other, in a relationship.
And in any relationship, there exists conflict. At often times conflict becomes one of our life's greatest nemeses.
But we do have power over our own reactions towards conflicting situations. Are we willing to exercise that power? That is a different matter that may need resolve.
You know what they say, "birds of the same feathers flock together". What if two same-feathered birds end up wringing each others' necks in due course because of some misunderstanding? Ok, that is pretty extreme.
Let's try another example - gentler. What if two same-feathered birds end up not speaking to each other in due course because of a big misunderstanding? And then the other says things about the other and vice versa, and the situation worsens upon being confronted because irretrievable words have already been spoken against each other and the anger cycle goes on and on.
This example is common to many, if not to all. So what makes conflict more conflicting? How do we set our thought patterns when confronted with conflict? A few elements may contribute to obtaining healthy personal resolutions whether you are directly or indirectly involved in a relationship conflict:
1. You cannot give what you do not have. If hatred is all you give, hatred is all you have. Open your optimism towards the situation and towards the person/people concerned and look for reasons as to why they are acting that way toward you.
2. Treasure what is being revealed to you. Whether it is at your favor or not - especially when not. Gain understanding and broaden your mind. When done, you get a more positive sense of well-being and that affects the way you approach the situation.
3. Humbly accept a fault. This is one of the hardest parts in conflict resolutions especially when conversations have already become heated. Objectively look at the causes and results of the situation and then aim to learn and grow up.
4. Talk less. Enough said.
5. When greatly offended, give. Four times. Four-give. Then repeat seventy times seven times. (Matt. 18:22) This is not always a blissful walk in the park and is mostly easier said than done. This is where we seek for humility and open-heartedness and ask God to change our hearts.
The elements discussed above are self-directive. It is because in most cases, when in conflicting situations, it is ourselves we mostly fail to take a closer look at.
If hatred or anger persists, a more professional perspective might be required. There may be deeper rooted causes to deep seated anger that only gets lashed out on varying situations and people of no relevant concern but that they simply came at the time when you are facing a battle no one actually knows about. Do not hesitate to reach out to people you know can help before things worsen.
Wellness is a mindset. It is well.